Konoha's Crystal Prince
by LAUGHIN ANONYMOUS
Summary: Kyuubi's sealed by the Sandaime? Naruto's missing? Hey wait who's that? See what happens when Naruto not only has a demon but a SOLDIER sealed inside of him. Naruto/FF7 X over.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I am your Partial writer for this fic.

Naruto: Who cares who you are.

Me: Well you should because if it was barney I don't think he'd make you as me and my friend have.

Naruto: I guess your right. So what is your name.

Me: That is only known to my friends and family.

Naruto: Ok so what do you expect me to call you.

Me: You may cal me Anon.

Naruto: Well Anon what do you have planned here. I read it and it looks awesome.

Me: Thanks! However I can't take all the credit my friend wrote the first part then stopped and gave it to me so I'm picking up where he left off.

Naruto: Well that's nice of you. Oh the portals open better get goin. Do you want to disclaim or should I?

Me: Well since this is the first chapter I say we let my friend disclaim

(A guy with brown hair and chains on his arms and legs along with a big ass sword on his bach comes in)

Ty: Yo.

Me: Hey. Please start this.

Ty: Hey ya'll bitches this shit ain't owned by us. Now Let's Start the show!

("Regular talk"/ 'Regular though')

**("Inner being talk"/ 'Inner being thought')**

(**_"Summon and Demon talk"/ 'Summon and Demon thought'_**)

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As a blonde spiky haired man in a standard jonin uniform and white coat was putting the finish touches to his plan he couldn't help but feel the pain in his heart. He knew that this could be the only way to stop the demon that was approaching the village that he swore to protect with his life.

"How's the battle plan coming along Minato?"

The blonde, Minato, turned around he saw two old men standing a ways from the door. The first was the oldest who was clad in a black shinobi outfit with a samurai like helmet and metal shoulder pads. The second was dressed in formal loose green shirt, a metal headband that had oil writen in japanese on it , and a red vest.

Minato the asked "So what are you doing here Jiraya, Sarutobi?"

"We came to see if we old men can be of any help to you" Sarutobi said with a laugh.

"This is my plan, so I will be the one to put it in action" Minato said regretfully.

"You can't do this" Jiraya said Angrier than he's ever been.

"I must. The only way to stop the demon is to seal it in my son, then sacrifice my soul in order to contain it. I hope that Naruto, Kushina and Kasumi will forgive me" Minato said as fear and sorrow filled his heart.

The Former 3rd said "Then I'm sorry to do this."

Before Minato had a chance to ask what that meant, he saw nothing but darkness. Sarutobi then took Naruto and the scroll both in hand then turned to Jiraya to say "Summon Gamabuta." Jiraya did as he was told and brought forth a toad the size of a 7 story building.

"**_Jiraya why did you bring me out here_" **the king toad questioned.

"The Kyuubi is destroying our land and we need your help."

"**_Ah, So the Kyuubi is here then. Very well I shall assist you_."**

"Well this is it, goodbye Jiraya, tell everyone that I'm sorry" Sarutobi said sadly.

Jiraya not trusting any words just nodded.

As the 3rd rode on top of the toad they eventually came to a stop when the kyuubi was in front of them.

As the 3rd was doing the Dead Demon Consuming seal the kyuubi spoke in a demonic voice saying "**_Do you think you can destroy me mortal_?"**

"I don't need to destroy you in order to win."

"**_Foolish mortal how will you stop me then_?"**

"Seal!"

And true to the name they saw the death god appear and force the kyuubi's spirit into Naruto's gut.

"**_You may have stopped me but you can't stop the curse that will change elemental countries_." **With that said the kyuubi fades to nothing.

As Gamabuta came back with Naruto, Minato told everyone of how Jiraya summoned Gamabuta, Sarutobi sealed kyuubi, and Minato made the seal. The civilians demanded that the child be killed but Minato as hokage forbid from telling anyone or they would be killed.

That was only the start of the Namikaze family's problems

4 Years Later

Minato, now sporting claws and pointed ears, sat as he wished that he never took the position as hokage. Many requests for his son to be killed or be made into a weapon, and other things scatered his desk.

When the toad king told them of the kyuubi's curse everyone wanted to kill his son even more. They didn't want to take the chance of the curse activating.

But the curse started to affect everyone turn some into moth men, orcs, and other demonic creatures

"They don't know when to quit."

As he was about to use shadow clones his pregnant wife, who turned into a nekomata, accompanied by Kurenai, a vampire, came into his office.

"Hey honey" Minato said happily.

"Minato are we still up for lunch?" Kushina questioned.

"Of course we are, we just have to get Naruto and Kasumi from Anko and we'll be ready."

Suddenly an anbu came rushing into the hokage's office. "Lord Hokage, your son Naruto has been kidnapped" the fearful anbu said.

Minato, Kushina, and Kurenai all shout out "WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

"My squad was watching over Mitarashi and your kids when suddenly your son wandered to get a ball. Once he picked it up a hole appeared and then your son was nowhere to be seen" the anbu said.

Minato said forcefully "Find Naruto. Search Konoha, its borders, everywhere NOW."

The search went on for a couple of days with no reports of Naruto being found. The family that was once happy was now sad with Kasumi cry for her brother.

She would see her brother again.

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Time skip 11 years later

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The sun was shining high indicating it was noon. As a blonde haired young man was walking threw a forest looking for a town to rest up. He noticed that a fog was forming.

'_This fog is being created by someone. Why is it that enemies are always around?'_

As the youth was walking he noticed that he felt that he been to this place before. The sword he was carrying on his back started to pulse.

"Do you have something to say, Sephiroth?" the teen said curiously to his sword.

Meanwhile

As a thick mist was forming a rowboat carrying five different people besides the rower where making their way to Wave.

The first person was a girl with flower petals for hair. The outfit she wore was a red dress, black boots, fingerless gloves, and using a leaf headband as a hair band, and had a weapon pouch on her right hip. Her name was Sakura Haruno.

The next person was a raven-haired boy with pointed ears. He was wearing black pants and ninja shoes, blue shirt with a fan symbol on the back. With duck ass hair. He also had a leaf headband in a normal style and was carrying a katana on his left hip. This boy was Sasuke Uchiha.

The third girl had long red hair going just past the shoulders. She had cat like ears on top of her head, and a long fluffy cat like tail. The clothes she was wearing were light blue pants, shirt, and shoes with a red coat and leaf headband around her neck. Kasumi Namikaze was her name.

The fourth person was a man that looked and drank like a bum. Nough said. He was Tazuna.

The last person was a man in standard leaf jonin uniform with white, gravity defying hair. His name was Hatake Kakashi, sensei of team 7.

"Hey sensei"

Kakashi looked at Sakura showing that she got his attention.

"Do you think we will be fighting anyone?"

"We shall see."

As the boat kept getting closer to land the members of team 7 all had different thoughts. Let's see what they are thinking of.

Sakura:_ I wonder if I will get Sasuke to notice me. __**Of course he will we are destined to be together!**_

Fag-man I mean Sasuke: _Itachi will die by man hands then no one will be better than me. DIE ITACHI DIE MWAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH_

Kasumi: _We gotta complete this mission and help the people of wave. I wonder if Brother will be there._

Kakashi: _Why did I take this team instead of taking missions to bring me closer to my dream of having the ichi ichi collection? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO_

Okay let's leave.

Once they get to land Kakashi announced that they will have to travel by foot to reach Wave which was two hours away.

Along the way Kasumi noticed that a bush was rustling. So the only thing that she thought to do was to throw a kunai at it.

"WTF?" said Sakura. Everyone sees that a white rabbit comes out of the bush. Kasumi blushed embarrassed.

"So Namikaze you really jumpy or what" Sasuke questiond.

"Shut up Gay-Man"

Kakashi noticed a difference in the rabbits coat color. I would explain it but you can watch naruto until you get to the rabbit part.

"GET DOWN" Kakashi yelled.

Everyone hit the dirt just as a giant sword zoomed by them into a tree.

"So you saw threw my plan to kill you all in one strike eh, Kakashi"

Once everyone gets up they see a dark skinned man with pants, shoes, and arm warmers with mucules, bones, and vienes showing hear and there.

Kakashi said, "So you were hired by Gato Zabuza."

"Yeah but I have nothing against the old man you have. So if you could hand him over everything will be cool."

"Sorry we took the job to protect him even if he lied to us" Kakashi stated.

Zabuza then jumped with his sword into the lake without falling in.

"HOLY SHIT IT'S JESUS AS A NINJA" Sakura yelled.

"No he's not Jesus so shut up Sakura" kakashi says annoyed.

"Hidden mist jutsu" Zabuza yelled like an idiot.

Soon the area was filled with mist and Zabuza disappeared into it. Then Kakashi told his team to guard Tazuna in a circle. He then released killer intent, which caused Sasuke to try and cut himself like all emo's do.

"Don't worry I'll protect you" Kakashi said.

"Don't count on it"

Zabuza appeared in the center of his team to kill them all. Kakashi then leaped and stabed Zabuza who turned into water.

Zabuza appeared and slashed Kakashi who turned into water.

Kakashi stabs Zabuza who turns into water.

Zabuza then in rage kicked Kakashi into the lake while yelling "RRRAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGEEEEE"

Kakashi then surfaced and said "The water here is dense"

Zabuza then said "Water Prison Jutsu"

Kakashi: _This sucks_

Zabuza then tells them about how genin are chosen in Mist. Kakashi then tells his team to run and save the bum known as Tazuna. Zabuza created a water clone. While Sasuke and Kasumi try to fight the water clone they get pwned 8 ways to Sunday.

Kasumi was about to be cut by the water clone.

"Demi3" a voice yells out.

The clone wasdestroyed inside a black dome.

Everyone turns to see who they thought was the _'Yondaimae.' _They took a closer look to notice that the blonde had spiky hair that looked as though he used gel. He wore black jean pants, black combat boots, black trench like coat, and black gloves with black sunglasses. There was also a belt with 3 separate pouches hanging on his left hip.

They noted that he had a 4.5 foot katana in his right hand while his left hand had a dark glow around it.

Kasumi noticed that there were wisker like birth marks on each cheek. Kasumi thought that her twin brother was found after so long.

"Brother?"

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And Break.

Yes, cliffhangers for all. Hope you enjoyed the first chapter of Konoha's Crystal Prince!

Kasumi: Hey Anon what the hell?!?!?!? Why did you do that to me???!!! Is it my brother or what?!?!?!

Me: Well Kasumi, it maybe your brother….

Kasumi: Yay!!!! I knew it!!!!!

Me: Hey I didn't finish!!!!! Now as i was saying, it may be your brother or it may not be. You'll just have to wait like the rest of the people.

Kasumi: I hate you, you know.

Me: Yeah I know.

Please review it helps a lot


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Welcome to another amazing chapter of Konoha's Crystal Prince!( I think)

Naruto: So will I get to kill anyone yet?

Anon: Damn! Why did we give you that much of a blood thirst again? Oh yeah I remember now! Because we wanted you to be bad fuckin ass!

Naruto: I know that already and you still didn't answer my question.

Anon: Fine! You get to kill next chapter. Happy?

Naruto: NO! But what can I do you guys created it.

Ty: Hell yes we did now stop your bitchin or I'll shove a pineapple so far up your ass every time you fart it'll smell fruity! Oh yea by the way my name is now Danteshadow1, but you can call me Dante. I'm also an author on this site. Ty? Why the hell did you say I was called Ty to begin with? Was that the best you could think up?

Anon: No but I had my reasons. So do you want to start this dante, or do we let Mr. Pineapple do it.

Naruto: Fuck you.

Mr. Pineapple: He meant me you dumbass.

Naruto: Oh…sorry.

Mr. Pineapple: Yeah you better be. Now the creators of this story don't own Naruto or any other game or anime ever. SO SUCK MY DICK YOU FUCK ASS LITTLE BIATCHES!!! Excuse me.

Anon and Dante: Where the fuck did that come from.

Mr. Pineapple: I have deep hatred of the world syndrome.

Dante: Oh. Well try to keep it under control.

Mr. Pineapple: No.

Anon: Whatever can we start now.

Dante and Mr. Pineapple: sorry.

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Naruto did not notice what was said but kept his attention on Zabuza and said "Why is the Browless freak fighting you ninjas" in a bored voice.

Zabuza in a fit of adrenaline and rage released the water prison and dashed to his new opponent while performing a helm breaker. Naruto caught the attack with his

bare hand. Everyone just stared for a moment.

Naruto then pushed the blade up while performing a horizontal slash which Zabuza barely dodged. Naruto kept on forcing Zabuza on the defensive with slashes,

punches, and kicks.

Naruto frowned and said "Can't you fight back or attack me?"

Zabuza yelled, "You little shit"

They both separated to stand a good distance from each other.

Zabuza did the signs and said "Water Dragon Jutsu"

Naruto just raised his hand and said "Shadow Flare"

The water dragon and dark fireball clashed while Zabuza suffering burns redering his arms useless. Once Naruto saw that his opponent down for the count he decided to get answers from the cripple.

"What's your deal with trying to kill them" Naruto questioned.

Before Zabuza could answer two senbon needles were embedded in his neck.

"What the hell" Kasumi yelled at the sight.

A ninja appeared before them wearing pants, a kimono top, and a sweater, while donning a white mask with a red tribal design. The ninjas and Naruto noticed that the temperature dropped a bit.

"Thank you for your help in bringing Zabuza down. I can take care of the rest," the masked ninja said.

Sakura said "Is Zabuza dead?"

"That person is a hunter nin. OF COURSE HE'S DEAD" Kakashi stated/yelled.

"Interesting way to kill someone eh hunter" Naruto said sacasticlly.

"What do you mean?"

"I might not be a doctor but unless that's poison in the needles he's not dead" Naruto said.

The ninja then grabbed the Ninja-Formaly- Known-As-Zabuza and teleported to god knows were.

"That was weird."

Naruto was just about to leave when he was face to face with the girl with fox ears. She seamed to be staring at his wisker marks as her hand started to feel them.

Naruto felt annoyed when the subject was his birth marks.

Kasumi retracted her hand and her broke out in a huge smile. She then leaped and enveloped Naruto in a hug shouting "Nii-san."

Before she knew it Naruto pushed her away and yelled "WHO ARE YOU?"

Naruto was about to say more but decided to find out where he was and who they are.

"Hey Grey Hair who are you and why was No Brows fighting you for?"

"We are a team of ninjas from the hidden Leaf village and Zabuza was hired to kill the bum over there" Kakashi said pointing to Tazuna.

"You gonna need help or what?"

Kakashi eye smiled and said "If your offering then sure."

"HOLD IT"

Tazuna stated "You may have saved us, me included, but I don't have enough money for one more mouth."

Naruto put his right hand into one of his side pouches as he walked over to the bum. He stopped, pulled out some coins and handed them to the bum.

"Is that good" Naruto questioned.

The bum just nodded dumbly while looking at the silver and gold coins.

"Well what are you waiting for?"

Everyone turned to see that Naruto somehow got way ahead of them.

"WAIT FOR US" Team 7 and the bum bridge builder screamed.

4 Hours Later

"I'm home" Tazuna shouted while he, team 7 and the solider entered the house. As they entered the town the once Crimson Soldier saw that everyone lived in a state that left some homeless, moneyless and foodless. After he asked about it he heard Tazuna's story to feel the need to hunt this Gato person down.

'_The last thing Gato will see is me about to behead him' _Naruto thought with anger.

"_**Wrong it will be a fox." **_said a red eyed demon in naruto's head.

"**Sorry but it will be Bahumat and Ifrit if I have any say in it_." _**a silver haired entity also said in naruot's head.

"Dad, It's so good to see you home safely" a female voice said.

Tsunami came out and greeted everyone and then introduced herself and her son who was sitting right there. The ninjas introduced themselves in a manner that even a brained dead monkey could have thought of.

Tsunami noticed a young man in black clothes with a sword on his back. "Excuse me but who are you?"

Naruto turned his head to look at her then saluted to her saying "2nd class SOLDIER Naruto"

That peeked Kakashi's interest.

"Naruto would you mind answering some questions?"

Naruto nodded.

"Where were you in the past ten years?"

Naruto said "Midgar."

Kakashi just looked at him then shrugged. "What was that SOLDIER title for?"

Naruto just shrugged "It's a rank."

"How did you get money?"

Naruto glared and said "Use your imagination."

Kakashi nodded and figured that was enough for now. He saw how everyone was looking at him to see what the next thing was going to be. _'I should send the mission report and send a notice that Naruto is here to sensei and kushina.'_

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?" Kakashi yelled while pointing dramaticly.

Everyone, except Naruto, looked out the window while Kakashi slipped his mask off, bit his thumb, and pulled his mask back up.

Kasumi turned around and said "Sensei there's nothing there."

The masked ninja just shrugged while doing hand signs and saying "Summoning jutsu."

A puff of smoke a Pakkun appeared.

"Yo" the ninja dog said.

"Pakkun can you deliver this scroll to sensei" Kakashi questioned.

"Sure anything else."

"Yes tell him that we found Naruto."

The dog turned to the blonde who was leaning against a wall. Pakkun noticed that his scent was off while he smelled like a fox there was also the scent of feathers and dragons on him. That confused the dog to no end.

"Well I'll be going."

Pakkun then disappeared in smoke.

"Let's go to sleep."

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A/N: Oh yeah another chapter up. Well not a bad start. Even though it was my friend that wrote it.

Kasumi: Ok Stop Bullshitin me!!! You know he knows me so MAKE HIM REMEMBER!!!!

Anon: (Trying to get the hearing back into my ears) HOLY SHIT WOMEN!!! You're almost as loud as Tsunade on speed and merlot. Now as for you wanting him to "remember" you then go talk to him. However I thnk it's kinda hard to remember somebody you never met.

Kasumi: Damn you to hell. Why do you have to use logic in such an illogical time!?!?

Anon: You don't know? Oh! My bad, I thought you knew. The reason is because I'm evil. So is Dante.

Dante: Yep! Now where is that damn pineapple I'm fuckin hungry! Hey Anon you want some pineapple?

Anon: I thought you'd never ask. Oh Mr. Pineapple where are you?

Ok now seriously people. I would like some more reviews besides just one. How am I and my friend supposed to get better.


	3. Last AN

Ok all you bastards, bitches, pussies , dicks, assholes, and all around evil fucks, and nice people(lol nice people HA) just playin. But seriously. I swear that this is the last A.N. I will put up before the next chapter. Here's what's up. I'm almost finished with it. And by some miracle I have decided to reopen the polls for Naruto's harem. Now don't forget ANY GIRL FROM ANYWHERE can be in it. It just needs enough votes. I am also going to allow a conglomeration to be opened. It will be the anonymous legion of fanfiction. To join send me an email. Also send me a message with your email and internet name. I DO NOT want your real name. You give it to me and I swear I will trace you I will find you. And I will kill you (where's that from bitches). The reason I am doing this is because I want to know what the reader likes. So lets say you want Naruto to have a certain bloodline or power. Tell me and I'll incorporate it. However it will first have to go through the legion. If we all say it's good then I shall. Add it. The legion shall be army ranked. All those added to the ranks shall start as private and then move up the line to Lt. And then Sgt. and last General. General's ideas do not need to go through the legion they just go straight to me. Lt.'s will only have to go through Generals. And so on and so forth. Now the next chapter will definitely be up on July 30th. So the polling the girls will end the 28th. _**SOGET YA ASSES VOTING AND JOINING OR I SWEAR MR. PINEAPPLE WILL BE SHOVED SO FAR UP FOUR URETHRA YOU'LL BE PISSING PINEAPPLE CHUNKS FOR A YEAR!!!!!!!**_


	4. Chapter 3

Anon: OK Yall bitches out there. This is the 3rd installment of KONOHA'S CRYSTAL PRINCE!!! Bow before your lord and master!!!! HA HA HA HA HA!!

Dante: Aren't you being a little Foamy like again?

Anon: So!?!? I like Foamy!!!

Foamy: YEAH!!!

Anon: Besides he tastes really delicious!!!

Foamy: Yeah!!!!!! Wait what?

Anon(with squirrel tail in my mouth): Nuthing!!!

Foamy: Hey you bastard stop eating me!!!!

Anon: It's not you! It was Disney's new animated character!

Foamy: Oh. Got any left?

Dante: What the fuck!!!! Are you a fuckin cannibal?!?!?!?!

Faomy: NOOOOO!!!! I just hate Disney! And what better way to state that then eating one of their creations!

Dante: Oh. I want some too!!!

Anon (giving a piece to Foamy): NOT TILL YOU DO THE DISCLAMOR!!!!

Dante: Fine! We don't own shit!! If we did we probably wouldn't be eating Squirrel!

Foamy: Yes we would.

Dante: Yeah you're right. NOW GIVE ME SOME!!!

Anon&Foamy: TOO LATE WE ATE IT ALL!!!!!

Anon: But you can have whatever's left of Mr. Pineapple.

Dante: There's still some left??? Gi'ME!!

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"So in conclusion the vampires will have more animals to feed on" Minato finished his speech with the other clan heads.

Every clan head nodded their heads and then disappeared. Minato was about to head out the door to his office when he heard the voice of his wife behind him.

Since the curse happened everyone in the elemental countries turned from people with pointed ears, fangs and claws into full demons. Minato noticed that he turned into a humanoid wolf while his wife and daughters turned into kitsunes.

"Glad to see that I came just in time to get lunch with you, Minato."

The Hokage turned to see his wife, youngest daughter and two sannin. He couldn't help but smile at his family but frowned when he thought of Naruto.

'_Where are you Naruto? What are you like now? We all love and miss you. '_were some of the thoughts going through his mind.

"So why are you all hear?"

"Lunch and to see how Kasumi is doing on her mission" a man with slightly more webbed hands, and frogeyes also known as Jiraya said.

Minato noticed that a summon symbol was glowing and did the hand seals.

"Right on time. Summoning jutsu."

Pakkun appeared with a "yo."

"How is Kasumi? Is she hurt? Do they need backup?" the kitsune, Kushina questioned.

"She's fine, not hurt, and they already have someone there and Kasumi is happy that she is there" pakkun answered the fox woman's questions.

"That's good but why is she happy?" a woman with a pale body with a double D- cup size bust, firm ass, and a horrible temper named Rsunade asked.

"I'll tell you. The mission turned into an A-rank mission when Zabuza attacked them." Pakkun said.

"What the bum lied" Minato shouted.

"Yes he did but this is important, they found Naruto."

The next thing Pakkun knew was Minato and Kushina were hugging and thanking kami, Tsunade and Jiraya laughing and dancing like mad people, and Clair was smiling seeing her family happy.

Pakkun then told them how Naruto went toe to toe with Zabuza, the strange Justus he has, the money and his strange smell. The dog also said that Kakashi might be able to convince Naruto to return.

After the explanation everyone was planning on what will happen when team 7 returns.

Wave:

Kakashi was just watching his team doing the water walking exercise. He also noticed that each of his students progress with it.

Sakura: no trouble

Sasuke: can only go 7 step onto the lake

Kasumi: same as Sasuke but gets distracted quickly and losses concentration.

Kakashi noticed that Naruto could sneak up on anyone without making himself known. "What is the purpose for the thing they are doing" Naruto questioned.

"The point is to get a better understanding of their chakra."

"What's Chakra?"

Kakashi made his face meet the dirt but after a moment or two got up and explained. "Chakra. It's the fundamental energy used to fuel techniques. Like that fireball you used."

"You mean my shadow flare?"

"Ah so that's what it's called. Hey why don't I show you how to focus your chakra? You might be able to get to their level in a couple of weeks" Kakashi says with an eye smile.

Naruto then forms a smile that would make an army of kages shit themselves. He then he started walking calmly to were Kasumi and the others where training passing them without a second glance. As soon as he reached to edge of the water everyone had different thoughts.

Sasuke: _The loser thinks he can do this when he doesn't know about chakra. _

Sakura: _What's he doing? Does he think that he is as good as Sasuke?_

Kasumi: _Brother why do you deny that we are family? What else can you do besides using your sword?_

But to them they saw that Naruto was walking on water farther than they did. But as soon as he got there he seemed to just disappear and reappear next to Kakashi before anyone could blink.

Naruto just continued to walk back to Tazuna's house when Kakashi told his team to continue the exercise while he guarded the bum. He started to think of the first conversation between Kasumi and himself.

_Earlier_

_Naruto was looking at the moon going nothing when he noticed that someone was walking towards him but stopped. He hated that the red haired girl was watching him at a distance._

"_Why don't you just talk instead of stalk? " Naruto questioned._

_Kasumi noticed that he knew that she was watching him. She decided to get some thing off her chest by asking, "Why don't you believe that we are related?"_

"_Simple, we don't look like each other, everyone else has either pointed ears or something like a tail, and I'm an orphan."_

_Kasumi didn't let it go and said "But we were together for 4 years before you disappeared."_

"_I can't remember anything when I was 4 and I dout that anyone else can. And before you say anything we are not related end of story."_

Present

'_Man that was a long night'_

**Few days later**

Naruto woke up in the forest and thought that he should meet with Team 7 to discuss their plans for today.

1 hour later

"LET MY MOM GO"

Was what Naruto heard and he saw Tsunami being carried off by two samurais with huge screws coming out their necks. He also noticed that Inari was about to be killed while trying to defend his life.

"Gato said he only needed the woman" thug 1 said.

"Let's just kill the brat and go" thug 2 said.

Thug 2 ran up to Inari and unsheathed his katana to slash the boy but was stopped by another katana. But before the attacking thug noticed the blade he was emidetly knocked out with a chop to the neck.

Without stopping he hurled his sword at thug 1 that knocked the thug out. The amazing thing was that thug 1 didn't get a single cut on him. After retrieving his sword and sheathing it on his back he tied the two thugs together with some rope.

"I'm going to go to the bridge. You should hide somewhere." Naruto said.

Inari and Tsunami both nodded and proceeded inside when he heard Naruto say one more thing.

"Your father would be proud."

Before he left he summoned two foxes to guard the house while he wasn't there.

Yes Naruto could use chakra. While in Midgar, Naruto learned all there was to know about chakra and all of the techniques the Kyuubi new. Making Naruto possibly the strongest person there.

**At the Bridge**

Kakashi was busy holding Zabuza off while Sakura guarded Tazuna like a 12 year old. The mist made it difficult for the leaf ninja to know when the demon of the mist was going to strike.

"Is she good for anything Kakashi" Zabuza questioned.

"I tend to think that she may be of use later so I can't say" Kakashi deadpanned.

Further away Sasuke and Kasumi were trapped in Haku's Demon Ice Mirror dome. Sasuke looked like a pincushion while Kasumi was suffering minor cuts over her arms and legs.

"You shall die here." Haku said in monotone.

"You can't kill me because I'm an Uchiha" Sasuke said like it was the will of kami or something. Sasuke thought _'This ninja will be running in a second because I'm a Uchiha.'_

"You're an Uchiha, eh? Then I'll kill you even faster and be on my way to help Zabuza." With that said Haku threw some senbon at them only for them to be deflected back at the mirror she was in.

"Sorry can't have you killing them." Naruto said while appearing in a blink of an eye. He then looked at them and sayed "Need help?"

They just nod while they stare at him.

Naruto just shrugged and said "Let's rock."

Haku decides to try and attack from all sides of the mysterious youth. Only to discover that all the senbon she threw she couldn't hit him anywhere.

"_Why can't I hit you_?" she thought.

Nauto stood there with an uncaring expression on his face.

"Is that all you got? I hope not. However before we truly begin you should know that Gato intends not to pay you just kill you while you're weakened." Naruto said with some concern in his voice. Naruto always had a sense of good and evil in creatures, and he sensed good in both Haku, and Zabuza.

"I already know. But I have no choice. I am bound to obey. I am his weapon." Haku said solemnly

" Is that what you think? Oh you beautiful ignorant creature." She blushed at the comment but got irritated when he called her ignorant. " He sees you as hs daughter. He loves you and will go to hell and back for you." A thunderous sound of birds chirping filled the area. " As he seems where he's about to go." Naruto stated. Haku heard the noise, turned to Naruto and showed him her face. He looked at her and recognized her already by her voice from when they met in the forest. " I'm sorry Naruto but I must go." Haku said as a tear fell from her eye and sped off to save Zabuza.

Naruto sped of towards them in hopes of stoping the attack.

_____________

With Zabuza and Kakashi

While The fight in the dome of mirrors was happening Kakashi and Zabuza decided to have a foerce battle of Jank, Ken, Pom. So far kakashi had on 15 times to Zabuza's 2 because Kakashi was using the sharingan against him. But this was no ordinary game. No. The winner got to slash the loser anywhere. And so far Zabuza looked like he was about to finished and told Kakashi to just finish him off.

"OKAY!" Kakashi said as he did the handseals for the Chidori. As he finished he sprinted into a mad dash for Zabuza thinking about the hefty fee he would get for taking his head. As soon as he got within 10 feet of Zabuza, Haku appeared infront of him.

" Haku move!!!" Zabuza yelled with all the strength he had left.

"No I am a broken tool. I must die to preserve my masters life." Haku said in a monotone voice.

" And who the FUCK decided that!?" said Naruto as he appeared infront of Haku and took the chidori to the chest.

"NARUTO!!!!!" was all that he heard as he collapsed on to the ground.

Anon: There ya go! Another chapter for this fic.

Dante: Dude I didn't write that Naruto gets run through!

Naruot: YEAH MAN WHAT THE FUCK!!! OOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW!!!!!!! GOD FUCKIN ASS WHOLE OF A WHORE SIDEWAYS WITH A BROOM STICK AND A CHAINSAW!!!

Dante: Oh shut up! It doesn't hurt that much!

Naruto: Oh really!?!?! And how many times have you been run through huh!?!?!?!

(Anon & Dante look at each other)

Anon: Did you really just ask that question?

Naruto: FUCK YES!!! OOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!

Dante: Well I'd have to say 3 times( a sound of metal stbbing through felsh is heard mutiple times) scratch that 10 times. Oh fuck it's the sins again aren't they.

Anon: Yep and they look horny as all fuckin hell. Oh and they have handcuffs, a whip, and a huge ass well Ass.

Dante: Ass asss or donkey ass?

Anon: Donkey. And it has a sign on it that says for donkey show on it.

Dante: Fuck you.

Anon: Sorry don't swing that way. NOW RUN!! RUN LITTLE MAN!! RUN! HA HA HA HA HA!!!!

Dante (12 miles away with the gilrs on his heels): GO TO HELL YOU BASTARD!!!

Anon: Already went there!!! Great place to go on vacation! Ask For the Lava Treatment. Oh before I forget this is Naruto's official harem, yet it's still up for adding.

Anko: 51 Yeah that's right I added all of them because I wanted to want to fight about it?

Hinata: 2

Kurenai: 2

Tsunade: 12 That's right I went there. I have a plan people.

Hina: 5 I thinks she's hot.

OC: In no mater what.


	5. the real chapter 4

Anon: HOLY FUKIN SHIT BITCHES!!! HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN?

Dante: About too fukin long.

Naruto: I agree. Now where was I last time….ooooohhhh yeah. OOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!

Dante: oh stop your bitchin and take it like a man.

Anon: Oh look whose talkin Mr. run from the stakes of Umineko. Hey wait how did you escape them?

Dante: SHTU THE HELL UP!!!! THEY'LL HEAR YOU!

Anon: Ohhhhhh?? HEY DANTE WANT TO GO GET SOMETHIN TO EAT LATER!!!!

Dante: Oh you are so fukin dead you ass hole.

Anon: I know. (smiles)

Naruto: What ever. Can we get on with the story please.

Dante(with a Groucho Marx mustache on): yes let's start this fine piece of reading.

7 stakes: HEY YOU WITH THE MUSTACHE!!! HAVE YOU SEEN A GUY COME THROUGH HERE THAT CAN'T DIE!?!?

Dante: NOPE!

Anon(with a gun in his hand): hey ladies want to see a magic trick?

(pulls trigger and shoots Dante in the face blowing away his mustache and half his face only for it to regenerate)

Dante: OH GOD FUKIN DAMNIT!!!! WHY ME!!!

Stakes: because we don't have to hold back on you. Now let's go devil boy, you got 7 girls to please and if you don't, well let's just leave it to their imagination.(points at me and naruto)

Anon and Naruto: IS IT OUR BIRTHDAY ALREADY!

Disclaimer: NOT MY SHIT!!!! NOT IN THAT WAY YOU FUKTARTDS!

* * *

Last time on Konoha's crystal prince:

"NARUTO!!!!!!" was all that was heard as he collapsed to the ground.

"no, No, NO!!!!! Naruto NO!" Kasumi cried while rushing to his side. "Oh Naruto, why! WHY DID YOU DO THAT! We were gonna be a whole family again!" Kasumi sat there looking at her brothers lifeless corpse with a giant hole in his chest.

Kakashi just stood there mesmerized at what just conspired in front of his very eyes and was thinking how fucked he was since he just killed his sensei who is not only the Hokage of Konohagakure, but the strong shinobi the world has seen ever! 'Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, OH SHIT! I'm so dead. May kami have mercy on my soul for sensei and his family will not.'

Haku just looked at the dead body of Naruto and just felt like dyeing. He was the first person to call her beautiful since her family died. And she felt that her heart was now stabbed, electrified, burned, buried, desecrated, dug up, frozen solid and then shattered.(yeah bitches! That's right I went there AND over board! Plus I just killed the mood.) 'Naruto……why……you were nice to me, and you died. Now not only have I failed as a tool but also as a friend.' "You with the sharingan."

"what is it?" Kakashi asked wondering what this girl had to say.

Haku looked directly into his eyes and saw something he had never seen before, total depression. The likes of which should not be seen in anyone's eyes. The only people that were said to ever have eyes like that were those that had nothing left to live for and committed suicide. "I want you to kill me." Was all she said before she ran full speed at Kakashi with a senbon drawn.

Kakshi just stood there unfazed by her words. He knew that she truly wanted death, and who is he to deny an enemy kunoichi that one unchangeable fact of life, that we all die. "Very well then. Come."

Haku charged straight for Kakashi hopping that she would see Naruto in the afterlife. 'Kami, please let me and Naruto see each other again in death. I have only known him for not long at all but I can tell that I will love him forever.'

Kakashi had already did all of the hand signs for his infamous technique. **"Raikiri"**(Lightning cutter) he started to run straight at Haku with his attack aimed right at her heart.

Haku saw Kakashi start to run and smiled soon, very soon she would be with her Naruto. The both of them were mere feet from each other and closing when a body came out of nowhere and stood with its face hidden behind its blond hair. Both ninja saw the body standing right in the line of their attacks and there was nothing either could do to stop the attacks as they were too close.

"OH GOD FUCKIN DAMMIT!"

Both nin heard the exclamation that was uttered so loud that it could be heard all the way back in Konoha.

**Konoha (at the same time)**

**(Random house)**

There was a lot of movement in the bed when

"OH GOD FUKIN DAMMIT!"

"What the hell was that honey?" asked non-important female villager number 1. "I dunno. But hand me some more of that there Viagra!"said non-important male villager number 5. "Wait but didn't you just take six of them like two minutes ago?" "So!? I want to finally have an erection dammit!" "It's ok dear we can try next year." "WAIT WAIT! I feel something happening down there! Could it be my first erection ever?" "Oh good for you darling!" the wife cheered with a smile. Now she wouldn't have to keep using the screwdriver. (A/N LAWL PUNS!) "Wait is it supposed to be that color?" The man asked. "What coloOOOOOOOHHMYGOD! What the fuck happened!??" As the couple just sat there on the bed looking at the man's more than erect, oddly colored, member. "Umm dear why is your penis double knoted and green?" "I DON'T KNOW BUT OH MY GOD IT HURTS! WE HAVE TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL!" "I don't know….I kinda like it like that. It looks like art." "ART?!? WOMEN YOU ARE ONE SICK BITCH! I'M GOING TO THE HOSPITAL!" "Well now don't go rushing things. Besides there's no way out for you. I locked the door and windows from the outside and the only way to get the only key is to fuck me so hard that it flies right out of my pussy." "OH MY GOD I'M GONNA DIE!" "Well at least you died from sex."

**Back to the bridge**

The body that got between the two charging shinobi now had two hands sticking out of him. One held a senbon and the other a ball of slowly dying lightning. They both then looked up Haku into the eyes of the body and Kakashi into the back of its head. Haku went wide eyed as she stood in shock and disbelief at who was standing in front of her.

**(A/N AND BREAK)**

**Anon: That was a great chapter. Don't you guys think (turning to Haku with her arm through her beloved on one side and Kakashi on the other)**

**Haku: WHY DID YOU MAKE ME DO THIS!!! I WANT HIM TO PENETRATE ME NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND!!!!( HAKU BLUSHES AT WHAT SHE JUST SAID)**

**Naruto: (walks out form around the corner with a banana in his hand half eaten) What's up!**

**Anon: Nothing Haku's just fantasizing about what you're going to do to her in a couple of chapters.**

**Naruto: Ah so you finally have your very first lemon set eh? **

**Anon: Yep and I'll tell ya it's got quite the citrusy flavor.**

**Dante: (Runnig around half naked in the background) I STILL FUKIN HATE YOU TWO!!**

**Anon and Naruto: WE know!!!!!!**

**Naruto: Hey where are the st…..never mind.**

**Dante: (being pulled away by lust with a sword in his stomach) WHY FUKIN MEEEE!!!!! YOU DO KNOW THAT ANON REGENERATES BETTER THAN ME RIGHT!??**

**Stakes: (turn to Anon) Is this true? Can you heal better than him.**

**Anon: Yes it is but I should tell you right now. That while I am better than him in every way possible you can't do to me what you did to him.**

**Wrath: Why the hell not!?!? There are seven of us and only one of you?!?!**

**Anon: Cause I don't think my evil horny bitch of a wife would like that.**

**Envy: Oh really well who is the bitch that get's to fuck you and we don't so we can kill her.**

**Anon: You want to meet her? But you already her. HEY DEVIL BITCH GET YOUR SUCULANT ASS UP HERE RIGHT NOW OR NO SEX FOR A WHOLE MONTH!!!!!**

**(A bright flash of fire and a beautiful woman with double f size breasts, a heart shaped ass, and legs that don't stop came running faster than a bat out of hell appeared and hooked onto Anon)**

**Devil: PLEASE DON 'T TAKE AWAY MY SEX!!! **

**Anon: I won't this time. But next time you get put in the dark void with your hands and feet in other dimensions.**

**Devil: Oh you know just how to get my motor running.**

**Stakes: (all stare in disbelief at the one beong they never expected to be standing in front of them)**

**Greed: What the fuck? Your wife is the owner of hell itself??**

**Anon: (smiles evilly) yep. (turns to his wife) They said that they wanted to kill you so they could have me all for themselves. **

**Devil: (looks at the stakes and pulls a sword out of nowhere) They did, did they? Well then I think I need to teach my servants a lesson.**

**Anon: Ok. Just make it quick cause now you got me started.**

**Devil: (looks at me and drops her sword) EHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO!!! LET'S GO NOW! (starts dragging Anon away)**

**Anon: UNTIL NEXT TIME PEOPLE!!! I GOT A WIFE THAT NEEDS SOME HELP WITH SIMETHIN!!!! SEE YOU LATER!!!! **


	6. Very important!

(A/N) I am sorry for the sucky length after the long wait and the fact that the a/n's before and after are actually longer than the chapter itself. I admit that I could have done much better. So I have taken it upon myself to rewrite the story from the beginning. I promise to make it over as best as I can. And constructive criticism will be greatly appreciated and flames are welcome too so I have a way to roast my marshmallows. I hope you'll give me a chance to write this over and then say it's crap before jumping the gun.


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